There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~Anaïs Nin

Thursday, May 5, 2011

I Don't Believe We've Met

Be yourself…everyone else is taken.  That’s the quote on one of the blogs I follow written by Beth.  I love this quote.  It’s pithy and yet thought-provoking.  (I’m not quite sure what pithy means but I feel like it applies to this quote.)

So what does it mean exactly to be myself.  Sometimes I feel like I am many people, my own version of Sybil with many personalities. So which one am I really?  Does being myself mean being true to how I’m feeling in that moment, or do I need to adjust my thoughts, emotions, opinions so as not to hurt or offend.  And if I change to please others am I being considerate or insecure.

Some days, I’m confident, strong, capable and feeling quite put together.  But other days, I’m fragile, insecure, and self-conscious.  Some days I’m on top of the world, on top of my game, optimistic and fun to be around.  And yet some days, I just want to crawl back into bed and start over tomorrow.  I can be happy, generous, thoughtful, but I can also be sad, selfish and careless.

Our character can be defined by who we are when nobody’s looking.  Well, I can be a real bitch when nobody’s looking.  I mean downright nasty.  I snap at my kids and yell at my dogs. So is that the real me?  I’m also told I shouldn’t be so hard on myself, but then aren’t I being myself by being hard on myself?

I can also be different things to different people, so is who I am defined by who you say I am? Which, of course, is dependent on the nature of our relationship and the circumstances under which we meet.  And if that’s the case I have no idea who I am because I can’t possibly know what everyone else thinks of me, or try to be what everyone else wants me to be.

So while I don’t necessarily know who I am, I also don’t know who I would rather be, and since everyone else is taken anyway, I might as well just be myself…whatever that means.


  1. GET OUT of my head. I could have written this. I have written versions of this.

    No person is any and all of one thing. We are who we are, just as we are. Why can't we be settled in that??? I don't know either.

  2. I feel like I am an amalgam of so many different people. Not in a scary, multiple-personality sort of way but in a "here I need to be mom and here I need to be a business person, etc" sort of way.

  3. are funny! I agree...we are all many things. Ultimately the lesson is that we can't be worried about what others think of us if they are going to judge us by one encounter. We all have a range of emotions, good days/bad days...etc. But you're right, even as I type these words I know its much easier said than done to not worry what others think.

    Debbie...I get that too. Different circumstances require different behaviors. I guess sometimes I wonder if I'm being false or if I'm just adjusting properly.
    Thanks for the comments ladies!

  4. Oh honey...when I was growing up, I had a vision of who and what I wanted to be. Not in a professional sense but the type of person I wanted to be...ummm sometimes I hit the mark but most days I look in the mirror and ask 'WHO THE HECK ARE YOU AND WHEN DID YOU TAKE OVER ME?!?'

    Its a never ending learning session.

  5. I am different around different people. I think I act the way I think they want me to? (Not that I act or do things I wouldn't want to or think are wrong.) That's why I love blogging. On my blog I'm just me! :)