There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~Anaïs Nin

Friday, May 6, 2011

Sorry Demons...Not This Time


I haven’t yet learned the art of pacing myself.  When I decide to do something I usually go full speed ahead.  Then I either crash and burn or lose steam and fade away.  True to form, when I decided I was going to re-take my fire test I pulled out all the stops to train.

After a week, I have pushed the limits and unfortunately aggravated a knee condition that I have.  And now the demons in my head are very audible…

“You are too old for this.”
“Your body can’t take this kind of training, give it up.”
“You are going to do more harm than good”
“Why bother, what’s the point”

The typical song and dance that brings me back to the familiar and comfortable place of I can’t…

But something is different this time.  I’m no longer willing to let the demons have the final word.  So rather than give up and hang my head in sad realization that I am just too old, I’m moving forward.   Because this is not a roadblock, but a setback.  And unlike roadblocks that stop me dead in my tracks, setbacks can be learned from. And they can be overcome.

So I made an appointment with my doctor to check out my knee and to get advice on how to proceed with caution.  And from there I will take the next step, and then the next step and then the next step after that.   By setting smaller, more manageable goals, I might just succeed more often and who knows, maybe I’ll even learn to enjoy the journey.  Because isn’t that really what it’s all about anyway?

3 comments:

  1. Great attitude and that's half the battle.

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  2. Good for you! When I read that you were going to be doing this I cheered for you. I am so proud of you. You have grown by leaps and bounds just since I met you. Yes, enjoy the journey! Love and hugs sent your way. Happy Mothers Day! XX

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  3. I have the same problem, Deborah! Hang in there, sister. You'll do great!

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