Do I drink because I’m bored or am I bored because I drink?
I have spent the last twenty years raising my children. Some years were so busy that they are only a blur to me now. The years of Little League and travel soccer required me to move out of my house and into my car. I packed the back of my Suburban with extra clothes, uniforms, food, Gatorades, first aid kits, and handheld video games. Everything I needed to be out of the house from 7 a.m. till 9 p.m. navigating practice and game schedules with the efficiency and focus of an air traffic controller.
Then in the blink of an eye, the kids got their drivers licenses and my life, as I knew it, was over.
So I did what any mom with some spare time would do…I joined the fire department. Becoming a firefighter was one of my greatest accomplishments, but it didn’t last long, because as will often happen in life, I was thrown a curve ball and I had to refocus my energies back to the home front.
Finding myself with far too much time on my hands, I found solace in my ever faithful friend, Kendall Jackson. Unfortunately, cocktail hour soon became the highlight of my day. Well, that and checking to see if anyone commented on my Facebook status.
How easy it has always been for me to succumb to old habits, drinking to deal with unpleasant feelings, like boredom. But not this time. The famous words of Albert Einstein come to mind…”Insanity – doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”
Hence, the decision to give up drinking for one year. Next December when I reflect on 2011 I am hopeful that my life is going to look different. That I will have grown in new ways, perhaps finally finding my true purpose…my destiny.
But if by that time there is no significant change, rest assured, I will be in the bar at midnight on New Year’s Eve buying the first round of shots.