There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~Anaïs Nin

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Downloading Destiny

      I am amazed by the advances in technology.  I am not very savvy with all the new devices out there, but my husband is, and he gets great pleasure in showing me all the latest and greatest apps and such.  I, on the other hand, am still trying to figure out my iPod.

      Just today, he downloaded a new app that will find local restaurants.  For date night, we are always trying to come up with new places to eat. With this app, we just punch in the type of food we want, how much we want to spend, what town we want to go to, and voila, it finds the perfect restaurant.  Ask, and you shall receive.

      But what about the bigger questions, the questions about life and our purpose, our destiny?  When I was young, I didn’t think much about these questions. In fact, from the time I was 16 years old, I knew that my purpose was to raise a family. I had even picked out the name of my first son, Zachary.  And 10 years later my son, Zachary, was born. Three more children later and I was fulfilling my dream of raising a family. 

      I have seen my kids through everything, from bruised knees to bruised egos, from championship wins to heartbreaking losses, from stitches to cancer.  There has never been a shortage of crises to handle, feelings to soothe, stomachs to feed. In other words, there was no time to contemplate life and its greater meaning.

       Now, 20 years later, with 2 kids in college, a senior in high school, and a 12 year old daughter who is more independent that I ever was, I find there is too much time to contemplate life and its greater meaning.   I have made some changes in this new year, with the hopes of finding the answers to life’s bigger questions and ultimately finding my new purpose but so far I have no answers.

     Isn’t there an app for this?


  1. I like your last are right there seems to be apps for finding a place to eat and all sorts of other things but the really deep things like our purpose in life cannot be found through some app. Since I am not very savvy with technology either it really would matter if there was an app because very likely I would be just as clueless as I am without you wrote about seeing your kids through all these various things you wrote about cancer...did one of your children have cancer?

  2. Yes, my third son. When he was 10. He's 17 now, healthy and strong and looking forward to graduating high school this year!