There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~Anaïs Nin

Monday, April 11, 2011

Lent Day Thirty Four - Me...In a Nutshell

There’s a difference between being different things to different people and being all things to all people.  Unfortunately by trying to be all things to all people I landed myself smack in the middle of a midlife crisis, looking at myself in the mirror and not recognizing the reflection. 

Throughout this journey I have learned a lot about who I am and I would like to take this opportunity to introduce myself…

First and foremost I am a wife and a mother.  I am a daughter, a daughter-in-law, a sister, aunt, great-aunt and a friend.  My home is more like a community center than anything else, where kids come and go as they please, help themselves to my fridge, and get reprimanded for ringing the doorbell when they should just walk right in.  Any child that comes to my house is “my” kid and I will treat them as such.  And in return, they include me in their conversations and in their lives.

I love to read. Everything I can get my hands on. Especially books that create controversy. I love to be challenged with new ideas, new concepts. I love to think. I get lost in my thoughts. So much so that I have been known to drive right past my exit while on the highway. 

I drive a pickup truck.  I love trucks.  The bigger the better.  If I lived near a quarry that is where I would work.  I was a volunteer firefighter for a couple of years, where I had the opportunity to drive a fire truck.  That was one of the highlights of my life.

I check my burners every time I leave the house. I cannot balance my checkbook. I always back into my parking spaces and I park far away from buildings, much to the chagrin of my passengers, who then have to walk a little further.  I love to watch the same movies over and over again.  I no longer go ga-ga over movie stars. To me they are just people, with the possible exception of Bradley Cooper.

I hate laundry.  I hate laundry. And did I mention I hate laundry?

I have friends from all walks of life.  I can sip tea with the ladies in my Christian book club, eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with my kids and their friends, and then chug back some beers with the fireguys.  I like guys who ride motorcycles, wear a uniform, and still know how to treat a lady…because chivalry is not dead in my book. You can hold the door for me anytime.

I love my husband, who actually doesn’t ride a motorcycle or wear a uniform, but he does sport a mean business suit.  He remembers every special occasion, he puts up with me and my shenanigans, he’s a great dad, and he let’s me have the remote…sometimes.  I also love the cigars he smokes (I’ve been known to take a puff or two) and I love that he occasionally gives up his golf game to accompany me to church.

And I love my kids.  My average, run of the mill kids.  Who were never valedictorian of their class, who did not get into every college they applied to, who sometimes brought home A’s and sometimes, well not A’s.  My kids, who prefer World of Warcraft to community service, prefer take-out to my home cooking, and swear as part of their normal conversation, even when talking to me.

But they also friended me on Facebook for Mother’s Day, share their good news with me, and ask for my advice… like “mom, how many beers can I have before I will get sick?” 

No, my family is not perfect, my life is not perfect, and I am not perfect, but together we are perfectly imperfect.


  1. I like this.
    I stand by my earlier impression that you and I are very similar ladies.

    Having said that, you also remind me a lot of my mom. In all good ways. But her midlife crisis got the better of her. I love that youre searching so hard for the answers. I wish she'd done the same.

  2. I knew there was a reason that I liked you so much. I enjoyed learning more about you...I find that we are a lot alike...I too am imperfect with an imperfect family and imperfect life.

    This past weekend a friend and I were talking about seeking God...and I thought about you...I don't think you will ever regret taking this journey of yours. I am really proud of you Deborah. Sending you love and hugs my friend. XX

  3. Lori, did you get a chance to read my post Loving My Neighbor? I think you might like it :)

  4. how fun to learn about you this way !
    and ummm, yes....that bradely cooper :)

    oh, and i actually really like doing laundry....silly right ?

  5. Beth, can I hire you to come and do mine! :)

  6. I enjoyed getting to know you just a little better!

  7. Good for you for having an "open door policy" at your house for your kids' friends!! Always good to make them feel welcomed and to feed them (I did the same with mine :)

    sounds like you guys have a good family and a good life!


  8. I love a post like this where I can get to know someone better!
    I was anal about balancing my checkbook for decades. Now? Not so much:)