There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~Anaïs Nin

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Lent Day Thirty Seven - My Future Awaits

Thirty seven days ago I made the decision that for Lent I would put God first.  That whenever I was feeling lonely, bored, frustrated or otherwise discontent I would go to God, rather than my usual coping mechanisms. 

I had the idea in my head that by the end of the forty days I would be a new person.  A new creation.  Someone different.  Someone I could look at in the mirror and like.  In other words, the perfect version of myself.

Now with only three days left, I can tell you most assuredly that I am far from being the perfect version of myself.  But my imperfections are growing on me, and with them so is my compassion.  Because just as I love and accept others even with their imperfections, so I have learned to love and accept myself.

I placed my faith and trust in God and He has changed me, although not in the ways I would have changed myself.  If it were up to me, I would have removed my sugar cravings, improved my organizational skills and eliminated my obsessive compulsive tendencies.  But God chose to work on my heart instead. 

So while I still eat far too much chocolate,  I worry less, and while my kids still have to sift through piles of unfolded clothes each morning, I am grateful to have clothes to wash, and while I still check my burners and locks several times, I know that God is in control and I am not.

And even though Lent will come to an end, my life with God is only beginning and I am excited to see where He will lead me. 


  1. I don't know that significant personal change ever comes in the way we expect.

    Again, thank you for choosing to share this journey with us.

    Carry on : )

  2. I would definitely agree with that! :)

  3. It's wonderful to read what you have learned in such a short time Deborah. I pray God continues to reveal Himself to you (and I'm sure He will:).

    I like Annabelle's true and very wise.

    Hope you are having a great day my friend!

  4. Yes, Colleen, I'm sure He will! Lent is coming to an end, but not my journey with God. :)